The Gift of Rock Bottom

Failure is the best gift you can be given.

Of course, when you’re in it, it feels like hell. Every day, every moment, feels like a struggle and it seems like it won’t ever get better.

I can guarantee if you don’t learn from your failures, you’ll keep repeating the same ones, so take this gift of failure to learn the right lessons so you can move on.

When you’re at rock bottom, you have a chance to build your foundation even stronger. Failure is like a building that collapses because of a weak foundation: Fixing the foundation will give you the ability to build a bigger building.

If you don’t fix your foundation, you will always find yourself with a collapsed building.

So how do you fix your foundation?

Well, what caused the failure? Did you not work hard enough? Were you not honest? Were you blindsided?

You have to be completely honest in your evaluation of your failure. Even if you were completely blindsided, there were signs that it was going to happen whether you want to admit it or not. Honestly is the only way here.

Then, most importantly, how can you not make the same mistake in the future?

I’ve had countless failures in my life and many of them I repeated a few dozen times until I learned what I was doing wrong. It took being brutally honest and being vulnerable and sharing all kinds of doubts to get to the bottom of my repeated failure.

Be honest, learn from your failure, get stronger. It will hurt like hell, but you’ll thank me later.

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Doing The Job That Needs To Be Done, A Lesson From Theodore Roosevelt

In our journey to success, sometimes we lose focus on the job right in front of us that needs to be done.

Theodore Roosevelt was always aware that he needed to focus on the job he was in instead of focusing on calculated moves to get him to the next position.

[A]t one period [I] began to believe that I had a future before me, and that it behooved me to be very far-sighted and scan each action carefully with a few to its possible effect on that future. This speedily made me useless to the public and an object of aversion to myself; and I then made up my mind that I would try not to think of the future at all, but would proceed on the assumption that each office I held would be the last I ever should hold, and I would confine myself to trying to do my work as well as possible while I held that office. I found that for me personally this was the only way in which I could either enjoy myself or render good service to the country, and I never afterwards deviated from this plan. – Theodore Roosevelt

Reading this quote from Theodore recently made me literally stop everything I was doing to think about this. Some of the best ways to deal with our problems today is to look at history.

I thought about how many jobs, relationships, internships, chances for growth, etc., that I have wasted by focusing solely on the future and not on the job and work in front of me. I had forgotten the great disconnect between doing the work that needs to be done to get to that future I was dreaming about.

Think of how great this world would be if people focused on doing the best they could in the position they had.

I would invite you to reflect and ask yourself if you are making the best of the situation you are in, or are you dreaming too much about how you want it to be?

The Habit of Hustling

Being able to live the life of your dreams is no small task.

And, unfortunately, most of us haven’t built up the stamina to carry out such a task, but if you really want it, you can make it happen.

With all of the modern-day advances in our lifestyles and technology, it is no wonder that our generation has no tolerance for hard work. We no longer have to wake up and work on the farm, child labor laws prevent most children from experiencing real work until they are halfway through their teenage years, and if we want food we don’t have to saddle up the horse and ride it into town.

Our ancestors would look at us and wonder what we do with all of our time once you remove those things, and I’m positive they would be upset with our answers.

Twitter, Facebook, video games, maybe one or two chores, tv, and a half-assed attempt at homework.

It’s no wonder we have a bunch of lost 20-year-olds who don’t know how to build a good life for themselves.

Success comes at the intersection of hard work and an opportunity. The opportunity may come, but if you haven’t put in the hours and hours of hard work beforehand then you won’t get it when it comes. Every single day you have to be preparing for your opportunity.

Hustling is not something you can turn on and off when you need it. It is a habit that is built through hard work and sweat equity. If you don’t have the life you have always dreamed of, you probably need to work on your hustling habit.

So, how do you do that?

The best tip to developing any habit is one from Jerry Seinfeld.

When he was a young comic, he got a calendar and would put a big red X over the days that he wrote, and your only goal is to make sure that you develop a long chain of red X’s.

Seems too simple? Some of the best secrets in the world can be that simple.

Think of one, maybe two, areas of your life that if you could get on track you would be infinitely happier. Maybe if you went to the gym and worked out so you can get a clear mind, or maybe your living space is a mess and being able to actually find things would improve your productivity. Once you have built that discipline, you can handle the bigger goals.

What is the first habit you are going to work on this month? Share in the comments below!

The Secret to Becoming Your Dream Self

“Why do people quit? Because they are not yet personally identified with who they have to be to get this thing.” -Elliott Hulse

This quote is going to define everything we are going to talk about this month: HABITS.

Habits are the foundation you create to get all of the things you want out of life.

Along with habits, it is important to get your mind around the idea of growth and letting go of the story you tell yourself.

If you believe in your heart and soul that you were born to live a legendary life, you have to build your mind to handle such a mission. You have to see yourself of worthy of a legendary life.

That will take time.

Just practice wrapping your mind around the idea that you are a legendary person and building a legendary life around you is just a matter of expanding your mind. You have to let go of whatever self-limiting beliefs you have about yourself and your life.

As you practice that, you also must ask yourself the most important question of all:

Who do you have to become to get the life you want?

If part of your vision is to build an athletic body, what kind of new traits would you have to develop? Being mindful about your food. Someone who can commit to exercise multiple days of the week. Someone who is willing to stick it out no matter how long it takes.

How do you do that?

Well, each one of new traits you have to develop can be centered around habits.

Being mindful about your food = the habit of preparing your meals early.
Committing to multiple days during the week = create a habit of going to the gym.
Sticking it out = practicing your perseverance and creating a habit of reminding yourself why you want your goal.

This whole month I will be focusing on the topic of habits to make sure you can properly build the foundation for the rest of your life.

So, to get ready, get out a sheet of paper.

Write at the top why you want a legendary life.

Second, write down in detail the person you want to become and grow into.

Third, think of the traits that you would have to develop to reach this new goal.

Fourth, try to take each of those traits and turn them into a habit you need to create.

That’s your mission for today.

Also, feel free to sign up for my mailing list so you can get the free downloads to accompany this whole month’s worth of lessons into downloadable PDF’s you can fill out. Click here to sign up!

Stop Blaming the Internet

Quitting the internet…
Is this something that sounds fascinating to you? Do you read articles every single day about how the internet is making us all dumber?
Can you imagine what Theodore Roosevelt would say if someone complained to him that they can’t write a book / get in shape / have a meaningful relationship because of the internet?
He would probably kindly invite you into the boxing ring with him so he can knock the inner sissy out of you.
We see it all over the internet: People blaming the internet for all of their problems.
They blame the internet for not having meaningful relationships.
They blame the internet for not having the time to exercise.
They blame the internet for not being productive.
They blame the internet for not being successful.
And worst of all, they blame the internet for not being happy.
Paul Miller was one of these men. He thought quitting the internet would solve a lot of his problems. He felt what we all feel at times: completely overwhelmed by the amount of information coming into our lives.
So, he quit the internet for a year.
You’d think this would be awesome, right?
Well… It was for about a few months. He wrote a lot, he hung out with his friends in person, he was able to really enjoy life. Then reality hit in. He realized he actually felt more lonely and disconnected than ever. He realized that his problems had nothing to do with the internet, and they were more internal than that. When asked what he wanted to do once he was back online he said he “wanted to do things for other people.”
He came to the same conclusions that I try to demonstrate on this site:
1. Success in life is a lot more about what you are internally than external factors.
2. Life is less about ourselves and more about how we can help other people.
The internet does a beautiful job of distracting us from dealing with our biggest problem: ourselves. If you’re feeling lonely, pull up Facebook or watch some porn. If you are thinking about how you are in the wrong career, instead of dealing with that, pull up some funny YouTube videos. You can always distract yourself from dealing with real problems.
If you lack the discipline to study during college, the internet will only facilitate that. If you lack the discipline to focus on your work, there are countless internet sites to keep you amused. But here is the thing, even if you didn’t have the internet, you’d still find other ways to distract yourself. The internet is just the facilitator, not the root of the problem.
Personally, I love the internet, and as someone who is committed to living the strenuous life, I love that the internet points out my flaws.
Growing up with the internet in my household brought a lot of knowledge to my life, but I can tell you that when I look back, I don’t fondly remember times I was sitting in front of the computer for too many hours. Instead, I fondly look back on all the times I was hanging out with my friends and being ridiculous.
There is no doubt that spending as much time on the internet as I did in my teenage years helped me all these years later now that I have an online business, but there is no doubt I have wasted endless hours, maybe even years, online.
Looking back, I know that my problems had nothing to do with the internet itself. My problems were my own lack of discipline and not knowing when to turn the internet off and get back to real life.
Now, looking at my dedication to live the strenuous life, I notice when I am distracting myself from really thinking. If I find myself browsing aimlessly on websites, I try to sit and reflect on what I was thinking about before I started trying to distract myself. Usually it was something along the lines of my life and my purpose here, or something that actually requires deep thought and for me to reflect on my life.
My advice to anyone is to try and notice when you are distracting yourself and think to what you were thinking about before you distracted yourself. It was probably something uncomfortable to think about and I would recommend shutting your technology down for a few hours, get outside, and think deeply about the thing that made you uncomfortable in the first place.
I’d love to hear your thoughts on the internet and how it has changed your life, so please leave a comment down below!

Don’t Be Defined By What You OWN, Be Defined By What You DO

Far too many people define themselves by the things they own instead of by the things they do.

They have an iPad, but they can’t tell you their most recent career accomplishment.
They flash their new Nike’s all over the place, but they never even use them to run.
They walk around with the newest Android but never use it for anything except Instagram and texting.

I know I am guilty of these things too, we all are, but we must demand better from ourselves.

Most people have been conditioned to believe that if you buy nice things you are a person of value. Obviously, we are learning as time goes on that this is simply no longer true.

What we now see are these hollow human beings walking around trying to impress each other with the newest and latest gadget to come out on the market all while feeling empty and hollow on the inside.

They feel some temporary rush of excitement and then realize that none of these items will ever bring true fulfillment… and to top it off, most people charge their important things to their credit cards so not only do they feel worse about themselves, but now they have to pay more for the item than it was originally worth. Credit card debt doesn’t make anyone feel better about themselves, especially when it is used for things that don’t even make us fulfilled.

When I reflect on the most impressive people in my life, it sure isn’t the one with the nicest things. It is the people who are always there for me when I need them. The ones who go the extra mile in every avenue of their lives. The ones who have impeccable integrity. The ones who seem genuinely happy.

You don’t have to go and throw away everything you own, although minimalism has its benefits, but be a person so full of character and integrity that no one around you even notices the things you do or don’t have.

Be proud of your accomplishments. Don’t brag about them, let your work speak for itself instead.

Shatter Your Comfort Zone

“If you don’t get outside your comfort zone, you’ll spend forever wondering why you don’t have an interesting life.”

How does that make you feel? A little scared?

Good.

It should scare you, because this is what you’re looking at in life. We’re all stuck in our own comfort zones and within the walls of our own mental limitations.

I’ll bet that for the most part you are living the same exact life day in and day out. How does the routine of your daily grind make you feel?

For me, it drives me absolutely insane.

I want adventure. I want to explore. I want a legendary life, dammit!

Reminding myself constantly that getting outside of my comfort zone is the only way to get all of those things I want.

Anything great that has come into my life got there because I stepped outside of my comfort zone. I felt nervous and I went outside of what was my daily routine, and marvelous things came my way.

It’s never too late to change your life. It’s never too late to mix it up. Above all, it is never, ever too late to become the person you want to be.

So, ask yourself: Who do I want to be?

Follow me at @SLManifesto and tell me your answer!